Life IS Ministry

The last few months of our ministry at New Beginnings have been challenging. We have had three young women transition into our home and a few others whose stays were brief as they were unable to complete our program. During some of the more difficult days during one woman’s stay, (to be vulnerable) I had thought that maybe I wasn’t cut out for this kind of ministry. But in those moments of prayer and desperation, God was whispering to my heart, “This is real life, and the issues you’re dealing with are real life issues. This isn’t a ministry issue.” I realized I couldn’t blame my lack of patience or endurance on the circumstances, but on my depravity and need for more of God’s Spirit in my heart. The issues I was struggling with weren’t going to be solved by switching jobs, they would be solved by the transformation of my own heart—that was humbling!

This did something deeper in my heart, too. The more I think about Jesus' life and ministry, I see the line between life and ministry blurring. Jesus' life WAS ministry--or, to use a better word-- love. Wherever we're at, we're called to love. Whatever fully occupies my time for the rest of my life, to love is my job. I can't run away from my mandate to love, whatever job I or anyone else has. 

None of us are excused from a life of ministry. But we are free to partner with our amazing God wherever we choose to go in loving people into the kingdom of God. We all get to live a glory-filled life of loving our God and loving His people. How exciting!

Conflict Can be a Blessing

I have always hated conflict. Being a part of or seeing a disagreement between people has always seemed to bring about the sweaty palms, quickened heart rate, and surge of adrenaline. I have spent my adult years (because we all know that youth thrive on conflict with siblings) trying to avoid misunderstandings at all costs, or if impossible than to at least help both parties to come to resolution as quick as possible. 

I'm not sure where all this came from. I do intend to get to the root of that issue someday soon, and perhaps a valuable lesson learned today will help me along the way.

We have had a young woman living with us for nearly three weeks now, and we're still working on figuring each other out. I had felt the rumblings of frustration all day and was quite anxious in anticipation, when  after dinner the volcano of anger erupted. My heart rate shot up and I leaned over and rested my elbows on the counter in an effort to still my shaking hands. Then something seemed to take over; I let her speak until she was done voicing her frustrations and concerns long bottled-up, and I suddenly wasn't anxious. I was relieved! I was so thankful to hear this woman's heart and honest opinions even through her expressed anger. The discussions took several minutes (which is normally enough to break me), but what I was astounded to find was that I actually loved this woman more after our argument than I did before! I was thankful to have been able to go through the vulnerability of anger and come out on the other side with mutual understanding. I now have more of a heart to serve her because I see where she's coming from but also how I can personally grow to become better at what I do.

So, I got in an argument today. And I am blessed.