Spiritual Preparations

Boy, these last couple weeks have been hard! Despite me KNOWING that it's God's plan for me to go on this trip, I've been struggling in many areas- time management, humility, and joyfulness. It's been extremely difficult to focus on schoolwork when all I want to do is plan, pack, and make phone calls for my trip. I've had to confront my thoughts when I would notice self-exalting thoughts and feelings. God is so faithful and gentle to remind me that this trip is NOT ABOUT ME, but about Him and His mercy and glory. I feel like my joyfulness has been attacked as well. Of course, I have had times of joy, but have been finding lately that many of my reactions to things have been very negative. This is not me!
In a time when his joy would be my strength, how convenient is it for the enemy that I wouldn't be able to feel it! In a time when humility is required to demonstrate the power of God, it would be fitting for me to be haughty. In a time when getting into the quiet place is so essential, it works out pretty well for my enemy that I have too much on my plate.
Isn't God's mercy so great! Even in times of struggle, he's faithful to reveal what I'm struggling against so that I can defeat it in his name! Ahahaaa, I have the victory in Christ Jesus! He gives me everything I need. He is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.